Tucker County Gladiator

It's a little late coming, but this promotional photo was "sent" to HypnoCentral recently, and we are obligated to pass it along to you. So few knew that within the placid nature of Mike (of Mountain State Brewery fame) lurked a beat-down, ass-kicking beast! Well, the truth is out now, and to commemorate we have the honor of bringing his photo to the web. Next time your aboard the HypnoShip be sure and eyeball the UFC poster behind the counter, oh yeah, Mike is on that one too! After seeing the above photo I have switched to Cold Trail Ale; who but Kathy has ever seen Mike with his shirt off?! Mike is ripped!

Over the weekend we spent some time in Mountain State; our Floridian friends, Keven, Shelly, and Victoria love the place. The best staff and best beer make it one of the many places we show-off to our friends, or just pick up a keg for our badminton tourneys. We noticed Chip (also of Mountain State fame) was sequestered in a cage behind the back bar, but more than punishment he has the kitchen up and cooking. Some laughs, some pints, and a sangria soaked menu was passed to me:

Food!

Organic Beef Chili Pie

Organic Creamy Chicken Pie

Creamy Veggie Pie

Pasta w/ Tomato / Red Wine Sauce

Organic German Sausages on Ho-made Roll w/ Chips (Beef or Pork Paprikawurst)

$5.00

I especially dig the "Ho-made Rolls", who really makes them? Good work Chip, and kudos for sourcing the Organic meat! Mountain State has a lot going on right now, and we are hoping Kate decides to add to the goings-on by booking Richard Cheese! We are just throwing that suggestion out there...think about it.

"I'm Mike Supak and I approved this message."

Bye Lindy

In an attempt to elude capture, our friend and neighbor Lindy is leaving the area until "the heat dies down." She'll ride out the next couple of months in Washington state in a cottage by Puget Sound. The mountain top is both sighing relief and lamenting the loss of Lindy's bawdy, low-brow sense of humor. We aboard the HypnoVessel place a high value on the sense of humor and look forward to her return with full amnesty!

Today finds many in the community sharing toast and jam while swapping the stories, ummm I mean gossip. You must be present to play! Chloe is hurdling over the mountain in route to DC, where Summer, Charlie, Gretchen, and I will connect in a couple of days. Anyone need goods from occupied America? Bring your lists to the shop tomorrow.

A curious lady, Lindy, thirty-three, beautiful, and Pilate's-toned she left me with an arcane excuse for leaving...something about "an uncomfortable alliance between Josie and myself, two women discovering the limits of ambition and the boundless rewards of human connection." Really? See you soon.

A majority of the above paragraph of culled, lifted, and well, plagerized from the back jacket of a forgotten book, "The Difference Between You and Me."

$7.03

Everyone who is anyone attended the Tucker County Trails Club benefit Thursday at Hellbender Burritos. You were rubbing elbows with local celebs, quaffing beverages with rock stars, dancing to Weedhawk music, and winning fabulous prizes. About one grand was raised for the Club, half of which went to pay Ben for mc-ing. Charlie danced himself into a dervish and made himself so acquainted with the band that he left on a first name basis with both Weedhawks, wow! Jeremy won the auction for the Blackwater Bikes donated Cannondale F7, thanks to Mackie for filling in as guest auctioneer. Also auctioned was an autographed Employee of the Month photo of our very own director! No this isn't a joke, Abus won the auction paying an outrageous $7.03 for the portrait. The Abus purchase has us wondering about her obsession with the Director?! Everyone had a great time, looked glamorous, crucial monies were raised, and it was a hit!

Gary, again, made the ultra-efficient and sparkling HypnoKitchen abuzz with his glamorous muffins. Out of the oven came, Peach and Raspberry, Blueberry Lemon, and Blueberry Cinnamon Chocolate (Blue Cin), and some more Raspberry Muffins! Gary works fast and often; he has to, as today brings the first of many Farmer's Markets to Thomas. Ben and Stacy (of Healthberry Farm fame) are bringing the goods. Thank goodness they were here to restock our meager Honey supply! Abus also utilized the kitchen, producing her popular Salmon Cream Cheese, and thanks Abus!

Happy Birthday to Adelaide, she is turning the big oh-one (1) today! I look forward to your party, you certainly know how to throw down. It's official, the party has changed locales, she shall now have her gala at the brew pub, see you there.

Now You See Him...

Celebrity watch: Musician, oops, magician David Blaine appeared in Davis yesterday. He confronted an unaware Mackie looking for "real" Appalachian folk. As we know, we are not nearly real enough, at least not all of us. He also appeared in Hellbender Burritos and made a burrito disappear, but not before again inquiring for real Appalachians. The ever-real and diligent Hellbending Staff sent Mr. Blaine down Camp 70 Road to find and astound local Grateful Dad and Rainbow Warrior, Bob. After performing a magic trick and revealing his identity (inexplicably camouflaged in a wig) the seemingly unimpressed Bob took Mr. Blaine for a ride in his Grateful Sedan, and after springing for a tank of gas Mr. Blaine again disappeared! Rumor has it Mr. Blaine headed for Webster Springs where the burrito reappeared.

Tomorrow make your appearance at Hellbender, make a burrito disappear, and support Tucker County Trails Club. Rob will be raffling a napkin used by David Blaine, and a half-eaten burrito formally being consumed by TV show grip Max Tape. The night should be crowded and fun, get there early and if you're lucky enough to win celebrity memorabilia you can flip it on e-bay.

Look for Grateful Dad, Bob on the next David Blaine TV Special, "Finding Sober Citizens in Appalachia is the Biggest Trick of All!" Most of the above tale is true, sure, I have a tendency toward hyperbole, but I have done my best to relate this story as told to me. Sometimes the story stands on its own.

Moving On Up

Another busy day aboard the HypnoShip. Today saw two (2) home school student reviews, plans for the first SBA (small business alliance) meeting, pre-hike nourishment, and countless other plans coming together over coffee, tea, bagels, and baked delicacies. Thanks to Chipper for turning us onto: http://iplayoutside.smugmug.com/gallery/5237100_ERJSv#318397228_PaZYp

The link features photos of your neighbors, friends, and other cycling degenerates in full mud bath glory. Enjoy the pictures (thanks to JR for the gallery), and speaking of neighbors, our HypnoFriend Ann is moving into Davis today. Welcome to the mountain top, and if I may say so, excellent choice of locale! We'll see you at a badminton tournament soon.

This seven (7) day work week and my immune system are having a falling out. It seems that even the slightest aliment on the mountain finds purchase in my body. An annoyance to say the least, but as you know, there's no rest for the wicked. Our friends from Florida; Kevin, Shelly, and Victoria, are as I type, making their way to the much cooler environs of Davis. I expect a full slate of activities to occupy our time, and a great visit is our immediate goal.

Gretchen showed up for work again, however, she slept most of her shift. I am not sure this work ethic is up to par, it reminds me of Nick's, and we all know what happened to him. Before reefing the sails on your community hub I would be remiss not to mention, yet again, the raffle, party, and music to benefit your Tucker County Trails Club at Hellbender Thursday, June 26th. I hear Highland Prospects intends to raffle autographed head shots of Ben, an OEM Jeep Liberty stereo, and building supplies left over from the recent Spring renovations at their shop. Bring your checkbook!

WV State Championship

The plot wasn't the only thing to thicken, the mud was the story yesterday on the race course. We HypnoStaffers (Nick and myself) started sweeping patrons out of the door around 11:45 and by the time the HypnopShip was ready for closure Nick and I barely had enough time to get to the starting line. Thanks to Mackie for securing registration. The West Virginia State Championships, or BikeStock as some call it, took place yesterday afternoon on the muddiest course of the year. It is a little embarrassing to admit, but I have never ridden on the trails that housed the race; oh sure I have run back on those trails plenty, but bicycle tires, unlike my feet, can suffer ruptures that make continuing difficult at best. I suffered an aforementioned rupture approximately two (2) miles into the race. Being of the "never quitting idiots who never use common sense club" I sallied forth with the flat. The rest of the race I continued to tell myself that riding the last five (5) miles on a flat was no big deal, but as all those I once passed were passing me I questioned the wisdom of my thinking. Even Nick passed his old boss without as much as a hello. Yes, Nick has been fired. The locals, as always turned out the top spots (author excluded), Mackie is the West Virginia Masters Expert Champion and Jason is the West Virginia Veterans Expert Champion. Nice job and we'll keep you caffeinated all the way to Nationals in Vermont!

Thanks to Sirianni's (so many pizzas donated!) and Hellbender Burritos (so many IPAs donated) for the post race hospitality. Rob (of Hellbender fame) rode to a very solid sixth place in the author's class! The practice paid off my friend. Also a big thank you to so many who came out to cheer on the locals. It was especially refreshing to come upon the race marshals bearing duck calls and aluminum cans that know you. Home turf racing has its advantages, and hearing your name shouted by so many as you go by feels damn good, thanks!

If you had the sad misfortune of occupying the HypnoShip yesterday at midday, we offer our apologies for the terse dismissal you must have received. It was only our intention to participate in a unique and challenging local event with our friends, not to push you into the afternoon confused and without a proper caffeine buzz. Normally we stay as long as you do.

Anne (of Patrick and Adelaide fame) was kind enough to bring her Raspberry Bars in for the counter today, and if you too would like one, you had better be quick, as I may eat them all! The always helpful and diligent Gary also restocked the counter after a busy weekend. Raspberry Lemon, Raspberry Chocolate Chip, and Granola Muffins made their way out of the oven, as did another Cheesecake! Thanks Gary. Another week, and we are stocked and ready!

First Day On the Job

Gretchen pulled her first shift on board the HypnoShip. She performed quite well; cooing, crapping, crying, just like the Director trained her to do. Many were impressed by her immediate on-the-job-training, but that's just the way we prefer our kids; working to pay our light bill. Chloe's been working since she was eight (8) and has thus far earned enough money to purchase her own trampoline and one (1) home in Florida. What will Gretchen purchase?

The counter is again flush with Gary's muffins. Dietary note: I rarely eat the sweets that inhabit the HypnoCounter, but I find Gary's Granola Muffins irresistible. I have convinced myself that the granola contained within the muffins counters all of the cholesterol inducing effects of eggs, butter, and sugar. Elude your common sense and try one; both you and your cardiologist will thank me. (Dr. Smith, please drop off mine and Gary's cut at the shop Tuesday, thanks.)

Does being Italian mean you intuitively know how to cook? Yes. Summer's cousin, Adam (of Marcy and Sophia fame), put together a couple of kitchen-sink lasagna dishes while here for Gretchen's birth, and they are terrific! Thanks and good work Adam! We have also been lucky enough to sup on Anne's Raspberry Bars, and whether by hook or crook I am getting those on the HypnoCounter. They are amazing and you will extend copious thank you's once you, too, are lucky enough to eat them. Thanks Anne!

Tomorrow's race course will be muddy and that only makes the plot thicken. Who will show? Who will win? Stay tuned.

Capture the Flag

This just in...Seth stopped in Hypno with news of the first of many "Capture the Flag" games in Thomas. You remember Capture the Flag, two (2) teams whose dual objective is to guard their team's flag while sneaking up on their opponent's flag, stealing said flag, and somehow returning to their home base with stolen flag in hand. Sounds easy, but it ain't. If you were lucky enough to play last year you know how much fun the game is, and how ridiculous things can get; what with strategy, prisoner swaps, clandestine arts, and laughs.

The inaugural game of 2008 starts Sunday, 3pm. Meet on the porch of the Fiddle, or maybe Seth's pad. A potluck dinner will follow, approximately 6pm, bring your favorite dish and beverage, discuss what went wrong with your attack plan and plot your revenge.

Back in the Saddle

The casual reader, accidental web-surfer, and misanthropes will have to bear with another day of baby photos. These are necessary in the appeasement of grandparents, uncles, aunts, and close friends. Have a kid, you'll see.

A new shipment of coffee and bagels met me this morning. Enjoy the freshness. I see you have been eating everything Gary baked; the last muffins evaporated this morning. Also new to the counter whilst I was away; Anna baked organic Power Bars, and her mom whipped up some killer Toffee Brownies. Good work! Thanks to every one's outpouring of kindness and help. Special thanks to Al for fetching the bagels this morning, I couldn't have done it without you.

Does anyone reading this blog cycle, run, walk, or skip through the many, many trails in Tucker County? Of course you do. Your community trails club, Tucker County Trails, is holding another party and raffle at your favorite burrito hang-out, Hellbender Burritos. Highland Prospects is spearheading the raffle again, and naturally we all look forward to winning sweet gear and hanging out with local celebs, Ben and Jeremy. Hellbender has again scheduled music for the evening, and this year brings the Weedhawks (I know the jokes, puns, and conclusions are being made all over Davis and Thomas) a band obviously down with the recent "pot eradication" program underway in the area. The night of fun, music, prizes, eats, and general debauchery will be Thursday June 26th. I hope to see you all in attendance; supporting our trail club!

Sunday is looking super-competitive for the WV State Championships mountain bike race. The beginner class looks flush with local talent and should provide quite the show. Who knows, maybe I'll polish the fenders on the Stumpjumper and throw elbows with the other merchants doing battle in Davis.

Here You Go

As the community already knows, we have been busy with a quiet new addition to the home and the Director has been running the show. I am taking a few moments out of this day to post photos for family and friends and check on the shop. The Director claims the shop has been vacant and that explains the empty till. I know he wouldn't lie or steal...right? Thanks to Moriah for the "rally" flier, we are definitely taking the kids for indoctrination. Bear with the ship as I ease back into the helm in the morning. My endeavour is to keep her on bearing, trim the sails, and coast into the weekend.

Gretchen Alexandra Williams

Summer did it "Au naturale"! Gretchen made her way into this mortal coil at 9:53 pm on Tuesday the 17th, she weighed in a solid 8lbs. 4.3oz., and measured 20.5". Having accomplished this goal Summer is going sky diving on Saturday, running a marathon next month, and taming a lion on Labor Day. Stay tuned for more death defying feats by our lady of Hypno. Many humble thanks to Marcy for her support and hard work! We may not have made it without you there, I am, of course, speaking of myself. We are home now and mother and baby are very well. Look for photos in the morning; gear required for photo upload are housed in HypnoCoffee and quite frankly we're comfortable here. The three (3) mile trip to Thomas seems undo-able at this hour. Thanks to all the well wishers, and to the Director for his commadeering of the HypnoVessel. See you tomorrow.

When It Rains, It Pours

When the apocalypse arrived it was Ben, Willie, Summer, a tasteful but dangerous tourist, and myself staring out of the HypnoWindows, aghast! Tasha and John had left, never to be seen again. First came the hail, then the flood, two (2) by two (2) the animals, caught in the storm-drain's maelstrom, perished, and finally the lighting rained (no pun intended) down upon all tall creatures, striking them down. HypnoCoffee proved to be a safe haven. The storm has also brought us Adam, Marcy, and Sophia. Summer's cousin Adam is driving the family to Vermont. Marcy will be pivotal in our lives tomorrow as she has volunteered to act as Summer's doula, and being an OB nurse this is a huge help. The storm brought demise for some, but for the HypnoFamily it has brought an ever expanding support team. Thanks mother-nature!

False Start

So, this is how it's going to be? As many already know, Summer put the call in yesterday afternoon reporting "real" contractions and requested I pedal myself back up the hill. Kicking patrons to the sidewalk and turning away a dozen others Nick and I mothballed the ship, delivered an airpot of Bolivia to the Director at the Mountain State Brewery NRPS show, and I made my way home. Upon arrival, I find Summer lying down, calm, neigh-on sleepy, and in absolutely no pain or preambles of birth. What gives? She was hiking on Dobbin House Trail when those "real" contractions took purchase in her abdomen, but now at home all indicators have subsided. Maybe another walk will put this situation back into Threat Con Delta? No luck, so it was off to Hellbender Burritos for a labor-inducing Gravity Check. After all, it was a Lost Hiker that put Summer in this position, but still no labor. Summer had me going yesterday. Thanks to everyone at Hellbender for their support and encouragement. We have the best neighbors: Mackie (1st place trophy in hand!), Jason, Sarah, Chipper, Sarah H., Stroh, Alden, Rob, and Melissa all offered smart-ass well wishing. We would have it no other way!

Mackie, as previously referenced took First Place and Jason took Third in his time trial. Well done gentlemen. Mackie made his way to the shop early despite attending the NRPS show last night. Early reports are positive, the pub accommodated 200 or so denizens yet felt comfortable. It was a clear and cool night and cooperation of the weather is always helpful. We eagerly await further tales from the show!

I can't believe I let this slide yesterday. The winner of the Highlands Sky was none other than Joel (of Joel and Kate fame), you remember Joel, he and Kate saved us after our bagel bakery burned. That's right, he and Kate made your bagels for about four (4) months...and he set a course record on the always difficult Highlands Sky course. Very good job Joel and congratulations!

Running and Eradication

All local runners participating in the Highland Sky yesterday completed the forty (40) mile race! As always, our locals have evidenced the amazing athletic ability the mountain top is known for. Congratulations and well done to everyone, Willie (two ((2)) hours faster!), Sarah, Kim, Anne, Abus, John, Ryan, Brian, and hopefully I didn't miss anyone. If you ran and I failed to mention you, please correct me. The race results have yet to be posted, but I will link them when they are available. Today's photos are courtesy of Abus' camera, thanks Abus.

Abus, amazingly mobile, made her way into the shop to cook today. Another batch of Smoked Salmon Cream Cheese (according to Nick this batch is the best yet!) and a hybrid Lemon and Lime Bar. Good work Abus!

Mackie, Jason, and Mike (of Sirianni's fame) are on their way to Calhoun County for the Appalachian Classic Bike Race. As always, I expect tales of hard fought battles now won. If memory serves, this one is for $$!

There has been a lot of talk regarding this pot eradication. After speaking with several "eradication officials" in the area I have learned that, although not as prolific as rhododendron "mary jane" grows in the mountains, and when found, the preferred method of disposal is burning. The burning method was endorsed by all of the eradication officials. As one official put it, "if you see pot, burn it immediately and continue burning until it is gone." Will do!

Expansion and Contraction

I feel for you runners today. Avoid running near Willie; he's too tall, a striding lighting rod. I encouraged him to wear my Patagonia Steel Sombrero with a three (3) foot pole attachment. He acquiesced...any takers? Free drinks for any Highland Sky participants or volunteers bearing stories Sunday morning. I eagerly await the chronicles; did John's injury rear its ugly head, did Willie beat his time, did Abus make it?

Curtis held his second cooking class this afternoon. Another six (6) lucky students hung out with the HypnoStaff and I especially enjoyed the ginger chicken! The kitchen was abuzz for about three (3) hours with minds expanding, Curtis espousing the virtues of our locally grown ingredients, and filling the shop with the most pleasant aromas. When the next class goes down I expect to see you here, the lunch alone is worth the price you pay.

UPDATE: the very affable and obviously fleet footed Harold (and wife? girlfriend?) made his way to us today! He looked much better than I did last year, smart training always pays off. Congratulations Harold and well done!!

Summer made some more of her marvelous Curried Chicken Salad, thanks Summer! Oh, you wanted to know if she happens to feel any closer? No, no contractions yet, but the day's not over. Keep your fingers crossed Kathy. Our doctor called the house last night and informed us if Summer has yet to deliver by Tuesday he will induce at that time. Think contraction!

2008 Highland Sky, Tomorrow

It was one (1) year ago that I participated in the Highland Sky 40 Mile Race. The race is again on, only I won't be doing it this year. (Today's photos are from last year's Highland Sky, a triumphant John, and Willie and I on the "Highway to Hell") I am lamenting my absence already, as we've served many participants this morning, and talking to these folks re-enforces my non-racer status. I have several excuses, baby to be born, the starting of the coffee shop, working seven (7) days per week, but the real reason is I failed to put the miles on my legs, hence I do not have the base miles a run like the Highland Sky requires. The lack of miles is inexcusable since that course and I have something to settle; it definitely got the better of me last year. Living on the mountain definitely requires sacrifice, but to sacrifice my time on the trails is hard to swallow. This will have to be re-addressed next year.

The best of luck to all runners tomorrow, especially the many locals turning out this year. I am impressed with you all and expect each gruesome detail to be told at the shop.

Good show this morning from Rob (of Heckbender fame) and Jeff (of PIMBY fame); they are riding the race course for the June 22 running of the WV State Championship bicycle race in Davis, and the number of locals participating in the Beginner Category should make that a competitive class. The Beginner Category is an open age class, so guys like Rob and myself have bicycles older than some competitors. I can't wait to see this one play out!

We received our HypnoMagnets yesterday; decorate the refrigerator, cover up the rust on your car, or have fun with your uncle's metal plate inside his head. No baby, no contractions either, but we are doing all we can to make this happen. I'll keep you posted. Summer feels so good in fact she worked today and kicked out a killer Curried Chicken Salad served over our fresh organic greens from Backbone Farms. The salad was quite the hit, look for it to be in steady rotation this summer.

The second Cooking Class will be tomorrow at noon, currently there are six (6) people signed up so there is room for four (4) more. Tomorrow's class will focus on Asian ingredients, Chinese dumplings, using and making curry pastes, preparing jasmine rice, rolling sushi, and as always the class includes coffee, water, and lunch for $20.00. That's not to mention the cool factor of hanging out with the local celebrities at HypnoCoffee.

CSA

The best looking, healthiest, smartest and most civic-minded members or our community picked up their first CSA veggies today. What's that? You didn't get a CSA membership? Well, warm up the phone and call Backbone Farms' own Max or Katherine at 301-334-5633. Knowledge of your foods' origins is the new enlightenment.

Charlie and I joined the Director in the running of the shop today. Summer is down until the much anticipated Gretchen makes her first appearance in this mortal coil. I am pulling for a Friday the 13th delivery since Charlie too was a Friday the 13th baby. The day has been easy thanks to the weather and Abus coming by to cook lunch for us and give a window into which we can see the future of lunch in the shop. Today she whipped up an al dente pasta salad with fresh broccoli, black olives, garlic, parmesan cheese, and cherry tomatoes. It was refreshing to eat so well! Thanks Abus!

We are checking into options regarding tea in HypnoCoffee, necessitated by our roaster's recent conversion to another brand. The constant ebb and flow of products keeps me on my toes, ever-vigilent in the pursuit of high quality products for you. It's nice to know I'm not the only one; Rob and Melissa stopped in this morning and we shared some amusing stories regarding the pursuit of products. We should all thank Rob and Melissa (both of Heckbender fame) for their deligience, just getting good tortillas is a constant challenge. I'll keep everyone updated in regards to the tea... yes, and the baby.

Around the World

Tanja (not Tonya, but the same person) made her way in this morning, via bike! Thankfully Aaron, on his own cycling adventure, met Tanja in Mississippi and together rode to New Orleans. The shortlist: Columbia was one of the best countries to visit, only one bad experience at the hands of a machete wielding bandito along a southern Mexican highway, New Orleans was a hit, southern cooking is horrendous, and the future brings New England as a route into Canada. In her absence friends have had children and others are pregnant so a visit home to Germany is in order, then onto Africa. World travel by pedal and wheel is indeed enviable, and if you are turning green check out her website for many, many more details. A good place to start:
http://www.getjealous.com/getjealous.php?action=map&map_id=13&go=tanja08209
Knowing how to read German is helpful! Thanks for sharing the stories Tanja, good luck and may the wind be at your back!

Charlie had a great morning chasing bubbles down Front Street! His new bubble gun is a hit with Chris too. Speaking of Chris...I would swear he was arrested, de-loused, and returned to me a reformed man. This new haircut is a must see! Even the beard is trimmed.

Gary, like a whirling dervish, churned out Blueberry Muffins, Lemon Muffins, Raspberry Muffins, and Granola Chocolate Chip Muffins. Not to mention a Raspberry-Lime Cheesecake. If you would like a Cheesecake to yourself, place your order with us before Wednesdays and on Thursdays Gary will bake them; and that starts now! Abus is up next, and we have a surprise coming from her! Details to follow as they are ironed out...stay tuned!

A Little Closer

Brief update: no baby... yet, but we are one (1) centimeter closer! Due to the impending birth of our child, badminton is on hiatus until Gretchen is here to play, hopefully next week! Gary plans on baking over the next two (2) days so prepare yourselves for more of his decadent Cheesecake! The Cheesecakes are so popular that Gary will start offering whole Cheesecakes for sale. That way you can take a Cheesecake home "to share" with family and friends; just you and the cake will arrive in your kitchen and the carnage won't stop until the last of the crust is licked from the plate. We'll be none-the-wiser for the act of gluttony, and let's be honest, you know you want to!

New to the coffee line-up this week is El Jefe Honduran. The "Boss" has been hard to acquire, but finally the beans are in! Tomorrow sees the first cups of this elusive brew, enjoy!

Today I met the cyclist who has commuted the farthest to drink coffee with us. Tonya started cycling from her home in Germany in 2005, and today she is visiting Aaron and HypnoCoffee. Unbelievably they drove from Davis to the shop. I, however, received reassurances that tomorrow she will bring her trusty steed, the Blackbird! With due diligence I shall capture her and her bike's visage and post them for you. I was just getting some interesting tales when Hypno was over-run by WV Adventure. WV Adventure is a freshman course offered at WVU, and today I had the misfortune of flying solo when this group of thirsty young men and women bombarded me with orders. No, I did fine, thanks for asking. Hopefully the next pass through our area will find me better prepared. I look forward to WV Adventure's next stop, and of course, visiting more with our epic commuter in the morning.

It has come to this: the frequent buyers cards are now so popular that the stack on our register looks like Community Chest, so starting tomorrow your cards will be in a Rolodex sorted by first name. We are on a first name basis, right?

Local Boys Make Good

Our HypnoFriends Mackie and Jason unequivocally kicked ass for 24 hours! Mackie and his Men's Master team took first place, winning by a scant four (4) minutes! Jason's team placed FIRST overall!! One hundred and sixty (160) teams attempted to over-throw our local boys, but to no avail. Kudos, congratulations, hell yeah, well done, and thanks again to Mackie for the Gold Medal!! We are proud of you guys!

A shop full of smart mouthed women on one side of the room and on the other? Six (6) men all cooing and aping for Baby Z. What's wrong with this town? Rumors filtering down from Davis are reporting Nanny's Deli had a sell-out grand opening! Good work.

Still no blog entries from our boys at Highland Prospects; all talk and no typing. I even hear that Jeremy is taking a "personal day", obviously a recovery day.

Nick made his way into the shop, on time. Amazing how he makes his way to Hypno promptly when he doesn't have to work here. This work ethic is far too prevalent. Nick needs to break from this cycle immediately, prior to his decent into not bathing, refusing haircuts, and masking the hungover facade in the sickly sweet olfactory assault of patchouli oil. Nick, get it together, we have already had to dock your pay for these transgressions.

Will Trade Coffee for Gossip

How did Nick make his way through college and post-grad work? He can't even make his way one hundred (100) feet to the right when leaving his front door on Sunday mornings. Claims of helping handicapped children and church attendance don't have traction in truth. I started a new strict tardy slip policy that I trust will alleviate troubles in the future. I knew I shouldn't have let the Director set the example and do the training!

We started serving Frozen Mochas to the throngs of sweaty denizens on Front Street and they have been a very popular item. Loads of complements and brain freezes from satisfied consumers. The Mochas are competing for supremacy with the Smoothies. Let the battle begin.

Speaking of battles...it is the Battle of the Blogs! Ben and Jeremy (both of Highland Prospects fame) have challenged me to a throw down of keystrokes. They have a lot of catching up to do, apparently they haven't paid attention to the surge and how well it is working. I haven't had a single casualty, and my acquired target rate is the highest since my occupation began. Ben (how'd the bender go?) has already made a tactical error in photographing me yesterday, Jeremy (just one more) claims they'll post the image. My image on their site will surely be considered repellent. My visage has yet to haunt these hallowed pages, and for good reason. Happy typing boys!

Last night, in pursuit of answers, I made my way to Mountain State (thanks to Ben ((how'd the bender go?))for the assist up the hill) where I found the Director pulling drafts with the aide of his new hair style...pony tail!? Bidding adieu to his normal Lebowski look for this improved metro-Audi A4 coif. He's now got more numbers than the Tucker County Yellow Pages, take notes Nick! More discussions with Mike (of Mountain State fame) regarding HypnoStout, a quick lesson in fermentation, ingredient addition, and the sharing of a pint. Yes, several questions were answered, and yes the Director Abides!!

HypnoSaturday

Many have been asking for an Application for Employment. We can't imagine why anyone in their right mind would want to work here. The owners are surly, foul-mouthed, smart alecky, cheap skates and the customers are worse, however, to help with the onslaught of potential applicants Nick and I have created an Application for Servitude.http://docs.google.com/Doc?id=dfk9ncjd_0dhs663cp Click the link, print, fill out, and return to HypnoCoffee.

Are you in Davis? Do you not want to trek to Thomas; well, get your HypnoFix at Highland Prospects. Jeremy picked up an air pot to stimulate shoppers in his store. I sent him with Colombian, and I trust no one person consumes too much. Mouths start running, tempers raise, fists start to fly; it will turn into another HypnoCoffee. Customers feel smarter and more brave after just a little Colombian.

Nick showed for work this morning, excited to peruse the plethora of phone numbers left by fans of the blog eagerly wanting to meet him. I was able to produce nothing more than snickers and the cold truth that no one has called. Sorry Nick. I am making an appeal to the copious readers: Nick needs your digits. I know, I know, he's an overly educated, pompous, smart-mouthed, misanthrope, but if given a chance he might just light up your life... or your cigarette. He could use your support right now. Today is the Belmont Stakes and he's fit to be tied... a lot of money riding on Big Brown.

Preliminary talks went well with Mike (of Mountain State fame) on the potential of a joint speciality stout, HypnoStout. If possible, a limited run of an espresso based stout may come out of our friends at Mountain State. We, of course, would jump at the chance to make this HypnoStout a reality, but the logistics on the Mountain State side are in need of sussing out. I am keeping my fingers crossed!

Whitewater Time Before Sweet & Sour Swine

He's Baaack! The river spit Curtis out and today he stopped in armed with swine. Sweet and Sour Pork with Jasmine Rice has come out of the kitchen. Boys and girls need to hurry and get theirs before we eat it all! The man also churned out the perennial favorite, Chocolate Oat Bars and Chocolate Chip Cookies. Everything tastes great and my midriff swells with the satisfaction of good eating.

Joining Rob on his two-wheeled trek to us was Melissa and Alden (all of Heckbender fame). Charlie really digs Rob's t-rex bike bell, (very nice touch) and Rob has a nice new rack...on his commuter bike. Thanks for keeping the wheels turning and pointed north in the morning, we really enjoy hanging out. Mackie and Jason leave for the Big Bear 24 Hour Bike Race tomorrow. The best of luck to our local riders, I know the expectations we have will be more than met. Tired and battered as you may be on Monday, do not shirk your duties; a full report is warranted.

Kate managed to make her way in and besides abusing the Director and I, she came up with her own slogan; "if you want baggage, then I'm your girl"! Hell yeah, that's the honesty we all need. It is also nice to get Kate off the task of verbally assaulting us, she is truly a wicked one! Not just one (1) but two (2) threats on my life over an iced mocha and bagel.

Rumor has it that the Director will be the red blur you see zipping through the mountains. If you grok cool red cars than the Director is your man, ask him about his Audi A4. This vehicular upgrade has chick magnet written all over it, now if he could only get an appointment with his one-eyed barber for a shave and a haircut, watch out!

Whip It, Good

Gary and Abus battled it out in the HypnoKitchen. Gary producing a Pineapple Upside Down Cheesecake (the biggest and fluffiest of the season) and Raspberry Muffins. Abus was in a hurry, but managed to churn out giggles and Smoked Salmon Cream Cheese. All in all it was a productive morning. A big thank you to our two dueling chefs. Much honor was brought to the oven!

Rob (of Heckbender Fame) made it in on two wheels, and this time I was ready with a new camera. Thanks to Rob for his patience and next time Melissa rides down I will be ready! Alden met us this morning (even though he's again living in Davis, welcome home!) and we force-fed him the new organic chai. The verdict...even Better!! Whoa, I wasn't too sure how this would play out, but I am happy with his decision. Next order of Chai (about a week) will be for the new Organic Chai! Alden says the new chai is less sweet, more of a honey flavor, and the chai tea is more to the fore, not buried in sweetness. Thanks for your help Alden.

Summer and Charlie stopped briefly in the morning and I caught Charlie doing his first "whip-it". When the Parent of Year awards are handed out we expect to be on the short list for first place! Thank goodness I was quick to blame Summer for allowing this whipped cream fiasco to happen. No, I wasn't stopping him, I had to photograph him and blame his mother!

It seems like summer brings out the solutions in our patrons. I've been digging the problem solving that takes place while sitting around our tables and sipping espresso. Amazing how the synapses start to fire by the second cup. If only the energy could be harnessed and channeled constructively, but alas the immediacy fades with the buzz.

Tornado Please

Whoever keeps cutting off the power can stop now, my computer is getting sick of it. Like a child that just discovered the light switch, Thomas has been under full assault. The changes keep waking the Director from his nap. Today brings a new HypnoStaffer, Angela! That's right we have another female on staff, finally the place won't feel like bachelor pad. Chris, Charlie, Nick and I are used to having free-reign over the HypnoStore, we might have to start acting more like decent members of the community. Maybe not. Angela is a student at TCHS and already gets along with Charlie. Bid a hearty hello when stopping in on her shift.

Kate (of Mountain State Fame) showed up and has decided to let me live. She was curious as to how I knew her favorite band was New Kids on the Block. It's so obvious.

We have a new Chai to sample. Our roaster, Larry's Beans, sent us a couple samples of their new organic chai, which is more in line with our coffees. We'll have Alden sample one and use his expert chai receptors as the flavor barometer. Tasting good is important too.

Speaking of taste, Gary will be in the kitchen tomorrow with Abus, so expect the counter to fill again. Expect miracles.

Is Today The Day? No.

We had our largest turn-out for badminton last night. It was tough to get a game in edge-wise. If this keeps up we will need two (2) courts. Everyone brought great food and we even blew the dust off the record player for a couple of disc spins. I have too many pictures to post them all, come by the shop for a montage of the day's play.

The bottom photo is of Mackie's Virginia State Champion Medal! Many congratulations to Davis' own Gold Medalist, and special thanks for allowing us to display his precious medals!! Also hanging behind the counter is his Bronze Medal from Sunday's race. Well done, and as long as Mackie keeps winning medals, we will continue to proudly display them.

Also making the photo display is the ever-smiling Adelaide. For reasons known only to Adelaide, she lights up around me, smiling, cooing, and laughing. Is my appearance so funny? Obviously so, and thanks to Adelaide for pointing that out.

Summer is back at the doctor's office...no baby today. She just called, same dilation as last week and baby not at the zero station. Oh you gamblers in the pool are following this and I will continue to keep you abreast.

...And now for the gentlemen (yes, I use that word liberally), Kate!

Kate, as you know, is the mom of three (3) awesome kids and her mouth alone is smarter than most of you. She's likely to break my fingers for this post so please take full advantage, as this may be my last for awhile, and no Kate was not interviewed for this.

Favorite Movie? Easy Rider

Favorite Band? New Kids on the Block, you jerk!

Favorite Book? Six Easy Pieces

What's in your refrigerator? 2 mangoes, 64 oz. guava juice, 1 qt. pureed pineapple, 1 bottle Grey Goose Vodka, 38 grapefruits, and a loin of some sort... that's the dumbest question!

Dream Vacation? Hawaii and a bottomless Pina Colada

Dream Job? I'm living my dream job, you jerk!

Which Would You Rather Have, Invisibility or The Ability to Fly? Invisibility, so I could sneak into your house and kill you without being caught, you jerk!!

Again, Kate was not interviewed for this, and much to Adelaide's protests to the contrary, Kate now thinks I am a jerk!

Big Screen

Jeremy and the HypnoFamily made it to the drive-in. Indiana Jones was a lot of fun, replete with Han Solo and ET! My only criticisms are with the video game like quality of some action sequences and the ponce of a son they gave to Indy. Suspend belief and enjoy the aged action figure. Thanks for the positive feedback from John this morning regarding the Ace of Hearts blog. I'm glad the blog made an otherwise rough day better...through ROCK!! In honor of the kind sentiments, today's photo is Baby Z.

Tonight sees another Badminton cage match. Jarred has been talking smack, and the time has come to humble our young friend. Come one, come all, two people per team, grill-able food stuffs, and favorite drinks are all you need to get started.

My foray into a computer based dating game has yielded others wanting their turn on the blog. Kate you are next. An extensive personality profile will be needed, and once I have extrapolated the necessary traits, off to cyberspace for your love connection. I will expedite Kate's application in lieu of her need-based request.

Dating Game

Finally, some competition for the Employee of the Month award. As many now know, Nick (of Alldredge Fame) joined the HypnoStaff, partly as a way to alleviate his crippling gambling debts and partly to meet women. He was under the impression we are some sort of a chick magnet and that his preparation of a woman's drink would disarm them, making them forget he is a counselor, constantly evaluating and judging them. Poor misinformed Nick. Even from behind the counter he is judging you, yes all of you!

Many are inquiring, no, no baby yet. Summer is doing well and her next appointment is Tuesday. Stay tuned, but if I'm suddenly not around, there may be another reason besides the flu. The baby pool is full and a few of you have lost already, putting your money down on an early date. The anticipation is palpable here.

Abus in sharing the kitchen with Gary yesterday, also shared her goings on. She recently attended a "Passion Party" somewhere in Tucker County. She arrived yesterday all giggles and declaring she wanted "one of everything". We of course are concerned with Abus' morality, and you know us, we are the pinnacle of high moral standard. Perhaps an intervention is in order? We, of course, are open to suggestions on how to get our Lemon and Lime Bar creator back on track.

The smoothies are finding traction, as well they should, our efforts in finding such a fabulous product deserve patronage. Thanks for the call-in order, Melissa. We are enjoying Chuck Berry this morning, and a special thanks to Doc L for the gift of Wild Berrys. Also, here's hoping the cancer benefit gig went well, I hope we were well within our rights to recommend you. Enjoy the sun today and speak to us tomorrow regarding the Indiana Jones flick. Tonight will find the HypnoFamily, Jeremy, and maybe others at the drive-in! Summer has officially kicked off!

Finally for the ladies?! HypnoCoffee presents: NICK (no we didn't do this for the Director, he had a girlfriend)

Favorite Food? Sushi

Favorite Movie? Legends of the Fall

Favorite Musician? The Boss

Educational Background? Under Grad Duke, Post Grad UT Austin, TX but my real education is happening now at HypnoCoffee!

Favorite Superhero? James Bond? (no, that's not a superhero, he's a spy)

Which fictional are you most like? Baloo from the Jungle Book

What is in your refrigerator? The neighbors & Tabasco

Favorite Drink? Cappuccino (made by ME)

There you have it, our bit of community service. Now let the calls come in (463-4900) and we will personally arrange a "meeting". Next, the Director??