Saturday, June 7, 2008


Many have been asking for an Application for Employment. We can't imagine why anyone in their right mind would want to work here. The owners are surly, foul-mouthed, smart alecky, cheap skates and the customers are worse, however, to help with the onslaught of potential applicants Nick and I have created an Application for Servitude. Click the link, print, fill out, and return to HypnoCoffee.
Are you in Davis? Do you not want to trek to Thomas; well, get your HypnoFix at Highland Prospects. Jeremy picked up an air pot to stimulate shoppers in his store. I sent him with Colombian, and I trust no one person consumes too much. Mouths start running, tempers raise, fists start to fly; it will turn into another HypnoCoffee. Customers feel smarter and more brave after just a little Colombian.

Nick showed for work this morning, excited to peruse the plethora of phone numbers left by fans of the blog eagerly wanting to meet him. I was able to produce nothing more than snickers and the cold truth that no one has called. Sorry Nick. I am making an appeal to the copious readers: Nick needs your digits. I know, I know, he's an overly educated, pompous, smart-mouthed, misanthrope, but if given a chance he might just light up your life... or your cigarette. He could use your support right now. Today is the Belmont Stakes and he's fit to be tied... a lot of money riding on Big Brown.

Preliminary talks went well with Mike (of Mountain State fame) on the potential of a joint speciality stout, HypnoStout. If possible, a limited run of an espresso based stout may come out of our friends at Mountain State. We, of course, would jump at the chance to make this HypnoStout a reality, but the logistics on the Mountain State side are in need of sussing out. I am keeping my fingers crossed!


Anonymous said...

Tony, I am interested in your dating service. "But I'm afraid I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run, if you will, so now I'm afraid I have something of a mess on my hands."

Tony, There are just so many poorly chosen words in that sentence

HypnoBlog said...

We at HypnoCoffee specialize in messes and wads shot prematurely. A patient and understanding partner is merely a few strokes (of the keys) away. The firm but gentle method we use will assuage your shortcomings.