Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Where In The World Is...

Many have been asking, in their salient pursuit of all things Hypno, where the hell have Aaron and Nicole been? How nice of you to ask. Now you know full well I never delve into the depths of rumors and half-truths, but I heard they left the mountain together about ten (10) days ago. Where'd they go? Las Vegas? Secret wedding? Crime spree? Does it mean anything that as soon as they left the Director showed up? Much like financial solvency, the truth eludes me. I am an asker of questions and do my best to merely "connect the dots".

Here's what I know. Aaron and Nicole flew out of Pittsburgh. Bangkok is beautiful this time of year, but neither have the kind of revenue stream it takes to keep them in both alcohol and Thai prostitutes for ten (10) days. Nicole has tattoos and there is a biker rally in Miami. Supporting that theory; Aaron rides around on a hog (please no Aaron's ex-girlfriend jokes) during the summer. However, a rally usually requires the motorcycle be present, and we already established that they flew out of Pittsburgh. As I have mentioned before, Aaron hails from an Amish background, perhaps they headed to the powerless community of Yoder, Minnesota. The problem with that theory is Aaron can't use his Ipod Touch in Yoder, and Aaron can't function without his Touch. I've got it! Thinking back on Aaron's background, his connection with wine in the color of red, and Nicole's constant insatiable thirst for booze and Donald Duck, it is clear they went to Orlando, FL. Orlando is the corporate headquarters of the Olive Garden, Aaron's Alma Mater, as well as home to Walt Disney World. In an attempt to further his climb up the server's ladder Aaron returned to the O' Garden's hinterland for training in sauces in the color of white and Nicole spent her days following adults around who dress as cartoon characters! So this is how I find out? I can see now they plan to leave their HypnoPost, and Aaron will drag them both to the hustle and bustle of a life having chain restaurants coupled with adult animation.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Ahhh...I hate watching TV...especially little tiny ones with little tiny screens. I just let out an involuntary sigh of relief when I didn't even have to touch a knob to see Charlie's face looking back at me down in the Morganhole of a pit I find myself looking up out of these daze...it could be worse...standing at the bottom of a pit looking up without a cup of heebeejeebee in my hand.